I was traveling down the Amazon, catalogueing birds
When a horrible pain overcame my jaw and my mouth began to hurt
I was far, far from a dentist but I came up a canoe
Bearing a Danish heavy metal band paddling towards Peru

I asked if they would help me
They took me to a shamans' shack
They they had to give me a root canal
Because the shaman never made it back!

It was a Rock n Roll Root Canal
In the rainforest of Brazil
These long-haired boys from Denmark
Had some basicd dentistry skills
It was a Rock n Roll Root Canal
In a South American slough
If they could deal with the eels
In their eight-inch heels
These boys could make it really big in Peru

We waited for the shaman as the sun rose in the east
I was counting on the healing touch of this mystic jungle priest
But as the sun ascended and my agony began to increase
I shouted, "Jesus Christ, I need a root canal!
Forget the fuckin' jungle priest!"

It was a Rock n Roll Root Canal
I knew I'd have to face the drill
So the singer gave me some ectasy
And a bottle of some other pills
It was a Rock n Roll Root Canal
A five-man metal attack
They bought a generator
Somewhere near the equator
And they brought it back to the shack

Then a vaporous hush descended as the jungle ceased her song
Then a stage set rose through the river's mist as the drummer struck his gong
The guitar player splayed his feet and he shouted out "Hello Brazil!"
Then he hit a power chord on the Flying V
And he used the whammy bar for a drill

It was a Rock n Roll Root Canal
They fired up the feedback
While I was filled to the gills with psychedelic pills
And I'm still having the flashbacks

It was a Rock n Roll Root Canal
Those Danes were kickin' dentamusical ass
They were dressed in black leather
though it was tropical weather
And the groupies floated in on a raft

It was a Rock n Roll Root Canal
We saved the tooth without that witch doctor chap
It was a Rock n Roll Root Canal
The shaman never made it back
It was a Rock n Roll Root Canal
The shaman never made it back